Why You Need More Laughter In Your Playroom

​One thing you will hear nearly every session in my therapy office?
 
Laughter. 
 
And that says a lot  coming from a therapist that works with high levels of trauma, attachment difficulties, and significant dysregulation.  

So....you might be thinking, isn't laughter just repressing the big feelings? Avoiding being uncomfortable? Avoiding sitting with difficult emotions? Therapy is serious business. 
 
And in some, cases yes.  This is why self insight for you as a therapist is an essential filter to understand the purpose behind why you use humor in therapy and to evaluate if it is actually therapeutic.  If you notice yourself using it to “rescue” clients from tough emotions that is definitely something to get consultation about. 
 
In other cases the modality you use is ripe for laughter - like in Child Centered Play Therapy! Here you let the child lead the way - and that might be into a play scene where giggles are the best fit.  *Remember genuineness is one of the core conditions in CCPT!*
 
But what about when these situations aren’t the case?  I’m talking about parenting sessions and more directive approaches such as Cognitive Behavioral Play Therapy.  This is where the intentional use of humor in the therapeutic relationship in a way that creates safety and therapeutic growth!  
 
I wanted to share the top reasons I intentionally use humor in my sessions with kids and grownups! 
 
First and most importantly laughter and humor facilitates the therapeutic relationship.  This relationship is so powerful that it is actually thenumber one factor for client change. Socially when we laugh and joke with one another it creates feelings of bonding and shared understanding.  And when you are a therapist for kids and teens? Sometimes that laughter comes in the form of a shared meme or a fart joke.  
 
And the parents I work with? I often hear them say things like “I can either laugh or cry, and I’d rather laugh”.  Using humor can increase your therapeutic bond with parents in this shared knowing of just how chaotic it can be to support children in growing up.  
 
Next, for me, is genuineness.  If you were to see me anywhere out of the office - I’m always laughing. Humor is a core part of who I am, and if I were to repress that during the therapy session I wouldn’t be showing up with one of the Rogerian core factors for therapy which is genuineness.  It would actually bring on something called incongruence, which is actually a threat to the nervous system and causes clients to feel unsafe.  And safety? It is also one of the essential factors for good therapy. 
 
My last top reason is something called titration.  Titration is when in therapy you take your clients just outside of their window of tolerance (likely with some difficult therapeutic material) but instead of leaving them there to emotionally flood the therapy is guided back into the window of tolerance with humor.  This is different than avoidance where all topics that are distressing are avoided OR the second it gets tense humor is used. 

Therapeutic intuition helps us support clients in sitting with it in the “just right” amount before coming back into regulated. If we force clients to stay outside the window or have no techniques or strategies to bring them back there is a risk of flooding and future shut down of any distressing topics in therapy sessions. 
 
And the cherry on top? Laugher can mitigate the effects of stress by decreasing cortisol levels and other stress hormones, positively alter dopamine and serotonin activity, AND release feel good chemicals like endorphins and oxytocin. Who wouldn’t want that as part of their therapy?  
 
Learn more about the sciency stuff HERE!  

Looking for more resources for regulation? Check out my training on Keep Calm and Regulate On: Play Therapy and the Neuroscience of Emotional Regulation!  This training is the deep dive you need to increase your ability to help even your most dysregulated clients ride the big waves of emotion! 

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