Ahhh if you have never seen Mean Girls you need to head right over to Amazon, Netflix, or wherever you get your movies and hit play. This is definitely an iconic movie about what it is like to be a teen. Oh, AND for the 20th anniversary Mean Girls has re-launched with a new twist!
Okay - so what does Mean Girls have to do with teen therapy?
To answer that question let’s dive into this moment HERE where Regina George tells Gretchen Wieners “Stop trying to make fetch happen, it’s not going to happen.” Now, what exactly is fetch? Well…..it’s slang for “cool”.
And slang? Well it’s something we see a lot with teens. With terms like salty, cap, basic, goat, fam, bet, and bussin, it’s almost like you need your own separate slang dictionary to keep up with teens. Certain slang can be used for hierarchy and status in the social world of teens AND where teens and tweens pick up new slang from and how they use it can be a clinical data gold mine. Yup, when a teen comes to session with a whole new vocabulary that's something to get curious about! Now as a therapist if you are trying to keep up to date on all the new terms, it just miiiiiight throw your genuineness and authenticity out the window. My rule of thumb? If you don’t use it in your regular vocabulary it will sound inauthentic in a therapy session. If I was attempting to provide an empathy statement that sounded like “Yea, it sounds like you are pretty salty about that. It sounds like you lowkey wanted an invitation to hang and they didn’t invite you.” the fact that I don’t sound like myself is going to be so incongruent than any empathy I was attempting to provide goes out the window. And incongruence? Well, it’s a cue of danger in the playroom. So, what do you do when slang comes into your sessions? Sometimes putting teens in the expert role and asking them to explain themselves and slang further can be a good direction and actually helps teens get greater insight and a deeper understanding of themselves and others. It also works to use the slang in paraphrasing back their experience to help them feel understood, if any only if you know what the slang means! So here is your official permission slip to stop trying to make fetch happen, stop feeling the pressure to “keep up” with slang if you see teens, and focus on your authentic self in the therapeutic relationship. Even if you have no idea what GYAT means and you have to get clarification. Which was me. Last week. If you are looking for more support in your work with teens and tweens in the playroom check out my course Growing Out Of The Playroom: Teens and Tweens in Play Therapy! This course is PACKED with over 25 interventions to use with teens and tweens in the playroom!
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Hi, there!I'm Ann Meehan, an LPCC, Loading... Archives
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